You're welcome to try...
****
It's strangely quiet in London at night. I know that sounds strange but it's true. I can sit on top of a building for hours on end and just enjoy the silence. There are nights when I don't have anything better to do than admire the silence. Silence is beautiful as it is terrifying. Most people are cautious of silence. I'm not. I use it to my advantage.
This is a normal night for me. I can jump from building to building and just wait with a good paper. What's in the news today?
'MP caught sleeping with female secretary'. Hmmm. Good for her.
'Large influx of immigrants will cause country to destabilise'. Not this bollocks again. You live in a war torn country and see how you fucking like it.
'Object seen falling out of the sky in Southampton. Object not identified, thought stolen'. People will nick anything these days.
'Humanoid object found in ocean thought to be alive. Scientists discuss existence of mermaids'. Ha. Nice to see Erin's making waves again.
'Black Dragon busts 12 year drug ring in 2 minutes'. And she didn't invite me? Bitch.
Oooh...a bang. What's going on here? Looks like some kind of gangland thing. I love gangland things. They think they're so tough with their accents and their guns. Just wait to confirm though...
"You do realise, I've warned Kruzhev about encroaching on my deals. I warned him there'd be consequences..."
Oh, Russians. My favourite...
"I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. KRUZHEV DOESN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS!"
"He knows full well that Southampton is MY patch. When something valuable ends up in Southampton, it's mine. No-one else's. MINE. So, I'm going to ask again nicely. Where is the item?"
OH. IT'S THIS GUY. I've been after him for some time...
"WE HAVEN'T BEEN TO SOUTHAMPTON! KRUZHEV KNOWS IT'S YOUR PATCH. WHY WOULD WE RISK A WAR WITH YOU OVER A STUPID SKY OBJECT!?"
"Because word on the street is that it's valuable. Unconfirmed reports suggest that this 'sky object' was a humanoid. Possibly an alien. Now, let's entertain the idea that aliens exist for a moment..."
I've met one, mate. They're arrogant arseholes...
"...Kruzhev could utilise that alien as a weapon. Get it onside, get it to help him and then take me and my whole operation down".
"WE DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ANY ALIENS"
"Do you know how many Naturals and Augs are in Southampton? It's a hot-bed for powered-people. And many of them are in my territory. An alien could potentially destroy them. Many are going missing as it is without Kruzhev getting an alien!"
"WE DON'T CARE ABOUT SOUTHAMPTON! WE KNOW THERE'S AUGS AND NATURALS THERE BUT WE DON'T CARE FOR THEM. OUR FAMILIES HAVE AN AGREEMENT".
"Which Kruzhev seems to want to break..."
"NO. LOOK, WE DON'T KNOW WHERE THE AUGS AND NATURALS FROM SOUTHAMPTON ARE GOING AND WE DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT AN ALIEN. I SWEAR".
"Hmmm. I don't believe you...Rough him up..."
"NO, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT...THERE'S RUMOURS GOING AROUND".
"What kind of rumours?"
"ABOUT WHAT'S HAPPENING TO THE AUGS AND NATURALS IN SOUTHAMPTON"
"...This had better be good. Or I'll chop your balls off and shove them down your throat..."
This ought to be good.
"There's rumours of an operation running in Southampton protecting them. Finding them and either stopping them, protecting them, or rehabilitating them".
"Who runs it?"
"I don't know. Some twenty-something. I swear, I don't know names! I swear!"
"Hmm. Ok. I'll look into it. But until I'm sure that Kruzhev isn't behind it, I'm going to send him a warning. He'd know better not to take me on. Especially with my latest acquisition..."
"NO. PLEASE..."
Aaaaaand that's my cue. I love jumping off buildings. I love it more than most people who try it. Bugger on the hips though. And they've also noticed me.
"Have you had an accident at work that wasn't your fault?"
"What the hell?"
"Ok. Here's how this is going to work. You're going to let the kid go, we're going to have a little chat about what's going on in Southampton and we're going to sort this out without any blood spilled. How does that sound to people?"
You know, the big boss doesn't look too impressed. And I'm less enamoured with his friend who just smashed a vodka bottle over my head. Doesn't hurt or anything but it does leave me wondering where he was hiding that bottle as he didn't have pockets?
"Now, was that wholly necessary?"
"...No?"
"No. It wasn't was it".
"No".
"No. And, now, I'm going to have to kick your ass, fella. Sorry".
The poor bloke didn't stand a chance. There's only so much one can do against superior acrobatics and a gunshot in the middle of the skull. Mind you, big boss was impressed. He was even clapping. No honour with these people. Mind you, Kruzhev's guy looked terrified.
"What are you waiting for? Hanukkah? Scram!"
I swear kids these days are getting dumber.
"Most impressed with your skills. You evidently know your way around a man".
Pfft. Lol. He does realise what he's just said, right?
"I bet you say that to all the girls".
"You must be the 'Leviathan' I've heard so much about".
"Correct".
"Shame. I was expecting someone...taller".
"Well, to be honest, you're kind of a let down too. I was expecting you to look more...Stalin-esque? I don't know. What do you think, comrade? How about we call this off and go collectivize the agricultural sector?"
"You talk too much".
"It's a nervous thing".
"You're nervous? Of me? But I am unarmed!"
"No. I'm not nervous myself. I'm nervous for you".
"And why is that?"
"Because you're unarmed. Now, if you want, I can take this situation much more literally and disarm you further..."
"I'll pass".
"Wise choice".
"What do you want, Leviathan?"
"Well, to be honest, I would murder a steak and ale pie. I fucking love steak and ale pies. I used to get them from this shop on Holloway Road, N7, but sadly it closed down".
"Shame. I used to own a restaurant on Holloway Road that sold pies".
"I know. That's why I've been trying to find you".
"...Because I closed down your favourite pie shop?"
"Damn...fucking...right..."
"...You're a weird guy, has anyone told you that?"
Most of the time to be completely honest.
"So. how do you want to do this? Would you like me to cap you in the face or I can show a pole up your arse and put you over a fire to spit-roast. Preference?"
"You dead".
"That wasn't an option..."
"It is now..."
Then he pulled out a gun. This is getting tedious now and I just want some pie. Is that too much to ask?
"Awwwww! That's adorable! Where'd you get him from?"
"If you must know, I got it in Nicaragua..."
...That word...that's a swear word to me...
"Hmmm. Yeah. Crime's common down that way. I keep meaning to visit. Worth visiting?"
"Oh, yes. You'd like it. Shame you won't get to go..."
"You know you don't scare me, right? I've faced a lot worse people than you".
"There's no one worse than me. I'm Dmitry Volstovov. I'm the worst there is".
"There's a guy I hate around Trillingham that would disagree. You seen him? Guy in purple and black, runs really fast? Has a massive God complex?"
"Funny you should mention someone who's fast..."
Then, in a flash, someone else appeared. It wasn't that Trillingham git though. Or that other weird fast guy who's half robotic? But this guy ran fast too.
"Really? A speedster? I fucking hate speedsters!"
"Now, Mr Leviathan, if you'll excuse me. I have to go and find a certain 'twenty-something' in Southampton who's messing up my operation. And I swear to God when I get my hands on her, she'll beg for death..."
"You do realise not many people do that right?"
Ok. So Volstovov's gone...now I'm stuck with this guy. He doesn't say much. That doesn't matter. I'll do the talking for both of us.
"So...you come here often?"
Tough crowd.
"Got a name?"
SERIOUSLY tough crowd. We're now doing that weird opposite circular dance though so that's kind of cool I guess.
"Well, there's Speedfreak...and there's SpeedDemon...how about I just call you...SpeedGit?"
No objections, your honour.
"SpeedGit it is. How you doing, SpeedGit?"
Oh! He is fast! Interesting place to aim for though...now he's just waiting there...this is weird...
"Probably should've said...those are out of bounds until you buy me a drink or two..."
This guy has NO concept of boundaries.
"Ok, look, I'm going to give you fair warning. I mentioned to boss man just now that I REALLY hate speedsters. And remember that Speedfreak I mentioned earlier? Well, I REALLY HATE HIM. And I've wanted to skewer him and chop him up for years. So, if we carry on down this route, I will project my anger onto you and, trust me, that won't be fun for either of us. Actually, that's only half true. I'll love it. You won't though. Because, you know, you'll be dead. Who knows! Maybe that dead teenage chick will find you a good place in the Veil?"
Nothing. I've had enough.
"You know what, fuck this..."
Out comes my one sword.
"You like that? It's a samurai sword! And the writing on the blade roughly translates to 'if you can see this message, you're too damn close to me sword!'"
Swish goes the blade. I miss, obviously, he's a speedster. Ok. Now I just need to imagine he's that bastard, Speedfreak. I'm sure I can do that...Ooh...it worked.
"Ha! Now I have you you bastard!"
Swipe, miss. Swipe, miss, Swipe, miss. OH COME ON.
"AT LEAST MAKE THIS FAIR FOR ME! I'M JUST A POOR BOY FROM A POOR FAMILY, SPARE ME MY LIFE FROM THIS MONSTROSITY"
Swiper, miss. Swipe, miss. Swipe, miss. This is getting tedious now. Ok. I'm just going to put on my headphones and get in the mood. What works for this? 'Sexual Healing by Marvin Gaye?' 'Girls ON Film by Duran Duran?', NO! This is good. 'Unstoppable by Lianne La Havas'. Perfect. Now. Let's do this shit.
My acrobatic skills are on fleek. My sword skills are pretty good too. My gun skills are a lot better but he's a speedster. He'll shoot me in the leg with my own bullet. Speedfreak did that once, the bastard. All because I went after the ginger Welsh girl! He must learn to share. Ha! I'm starting to win! WAIT...There's a pattern developing here...he goes to the same point every 5 seconds...if I time it right...Oh my God...I can see if the leg thing really works!
5...4...3...2...1...SWIPE. OH YES! HE FLEW INTO THE WALL! I wish I had my camera. ITV would've paid 250 quid for that clip. Oh that was stunning. Actually, that's selfie material...hold on...
****
Ok. Now I'm in a dilemma. Do I go to Southampton and find that 'twenty-something' before Volstovov does? Do I stay here and let her deal with it or do I just take out Volstovov's entire organisation here. Hmmm. Well, now that I'm home I'll sleep on it. The ceiling might hold some answers...
...Oh...yeah. I forgot her picture was there...She'd know what to do. She always did... Still the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. And that says a lot. I know a woman who's the daughter of the most beautiful goddess in Greek mythology...Still. Nothing compares to her.
It feels good without my mask. I can be myself now. That's the problem with having two different personalities. It can get a little crowded. When the mask is on, I'm the Leviathan. Without the mask on, I'm James Monroe. Just an ordinary guy that no-one really cares about. No-one ever really did except her...Ruth Worcester. The most beautiful woman I've ever had the privilege to lay my eyes on.
I don't know why I'm saying this all to myself. I know all this. Oh well, I suppose it's good to remind myself of who I really am from time to time.
I promise I'll find him, Ruth...the guy that took you away from me...and I swear I will make him pay. Even if it means I have to go to Nicaragua to do it...Until then...to less exotic climbs. I wonder if Southampton has any beach-side swimming pools...does Southampton even have a beach? Bet it's got a nudist colony...
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