“Are you entirely sure you ladies can cope?” Leviathan asked
mockingly, patting down his ammo bag and looking to Speedfreak with a glint in
his eye, challenging him silently. “I mean, she’s a lot to handle.”
“Well, James, I
think we can handle a baby,” Othergirl rolled her eyes at him. “Especially such
a cute one.”
“Don’t use the J word.
And besides, how would you know?” Leviathan affixed her with a look, licking
his lips as he chose his words carefully. “You can’t just put this one to
sleep. Or k-”
“Don’t finish that sentence,” Visionarie warned, holding up
one finger. “Really, don’t. She’s not above f-u-c-k-ing you up. Baby or no
baby.”
“But…”
“Piss off, Levi.” Visionarie sighed, flapping her hands at
him, and he grinned mischievously in response, stepping out the front door and
disappearing into the darkness of the night, leaving the four of them alone
together.
Othergirl looked down at the small human, laid contentedly
on her play-mat, and smiled at her fondly. “Look at her. She’s a precious darling.
Isn’t she wonderful?”
“Guys, she’s just a
baby,” Jody reminded them with bemusement. “Well, a baby with gifts. Nothing
overly exciting.”
“She’s a baby,” Visionarie
pointed out, pouting at him slightly before returning her attention to baby
Maddie. “Admittedly, she is Levi’s, but I can overlook that minor fault in
favour of how cute she looks.”
Othergirl sat on the floor, her legs crossed under her,
picking Maddie up and cuddling her close to her chest, stroking the little
girl’s dark hair. “Does she really end up dating you, Jody?”
“Yeah, temporarily” he admitted unwillingly, grimacing as he spoke. “One
day. I guess. I’m not sure what’s weirder. That I’m gonna… date her… or that
I’ve kissed Levi’s… ah, hell.” He groaned loudly, putting his hands over
his face. “I’ve snogged Levi’s daughter. He’s gonna kill me.”
“It’s Levi. He’s probably going to be over the moon that
he’s kinda your father-in-law.” Visionarie noted. “You can go round for Sunday
dinner, and call him daddy.”
“Don’t even make jokes about that, Steph,” Jody warned,
narrowing his eyes at Maddie suspiciously. “Why’s she staring at me?”
“Urm, because you’re wearing an eye-watering suit, and
babies like bright colours?” Othergirl suggested.
“How would you know?” Jody snapped, watching guiltily as her
jaw set in anger. “Sorry, I… sorry.”
“I have the internet, asshole. And that includes baby
websites. Babies like bright colours. Stop being a dick about this just because
of the dating thing.” Othergirl scowled furiously at him, before turning her
attention to the other woman. “Steph, do we have any toys?”
“Nope,” Visionarie chewed her lip thoughtfully, running
through the possibilities. “Guns, yes. Grenades, yes. Radium, yes. Baby toys,
no.”
“Oh, great,” Othergirl said sarcastically. “Yeah, let’s give
the baby a Magnum handgun, see how that goes. Levi would be so appreciative.”
“Are you kidding? Levi would be a proud dad,” Visionarie
grinned at her girlfriend. “Baby’s first gun.”
“No,” Maddie said distinctly, and Othergirl looked down at
her in surprise, unsure what to do. “No.”
“She makes noises. Should she be making noises?”
“Baby websites?” Jody reminded, lying back on the sofa and
closing his eyes.
“Baby websites don’t say jack shit about babies with superpowers,” Othergirl shot back
defensively. “So I don’t know. Do babies do that? Superbabies?”
“Never say superbabies again.” Visionarie made a face,
turning and disappearing back into the kitchen to check on dinner. “She’s a
Natural.”
“She’s a superbaby.” Othergirl looked down at Maddie fondly.
“Aren’t you?”
“Da,” Maddie grinned up at Othergirl proudly, clapping her
hands together and drawing them apart to reveal a small, perfectly formed
orange fireball. “Da.”
“Ah…” Othergirl regarded the baby with concern. “Jody…”
“Mm?” he asked, only half-listening.
“We got a problem.”
“What kind of problem?”
“Like, a four-hundred-degree problem…” Othergirl held Maddie
at arm’s length, surveying her and the fireball with apprehension, unsure how
to proceed.
“What?” he asked, and Maddie turned her attention to him, holding
out her arms sending the fireball spiralling into the cushion by his head. The
cheap polyester burst into flames, and Speedfreak jumped up with a shout,
snatching up the pillow and disappearing outside in a blur. Maddie looked
momentarily guilty, and then began to giggle uncontrollably.
“This is not funny,”
Othergirl chided, trying to keep a straight face. “This is very much not funny.
Bad baby.”
“What did she do?” Visionarie reappeared, drying her hands
on a tea towel. “Why can I smell burning?”
“Maddie-” Othergirl was spared having to explain by Maddie’s
conjuring of another fireball.
“Holy shit.”
Visionarie reached back into the kitchen, pulling out a fire extinguisher and
aiming it squarely at the baby, activating it and covering infant, Aug and most
of the lounge in white foam. Othergirl coughed and wiped the mess from her
face, glaring at Visionarie with fury.
“What the hell did you do that for?!” she asked with anger,
as Maddie burst into tears at the extinguishing of her pretty lights. “Now
she’s crying, and I’m covered in crap, and – stop laughing, this isn’t funny!”
“My girlfriend is holding a baby and covered in white… yick.
This is pretty funny.”
“I hate you,” Othergirl reminded her sweetly. “A lot.” She
shifted Maddie to her hip, bouncing her carefully as Speedfreak returned to the
room, minus the flaming pillow.
“What the hell…”
“Steph took… inventive
action,” Othergirl spat resentfully. “To help.”
“Shut up, you’re not on fire, are you?”
“No, but my suit is ruined.”
“So take it off.” Visionarie smirked.
“Make me,” Othergirl snarled. “Go on.”
“I am present,” Speedfreak interjected politely. “Nudity is
not encouraged. Thanks.”
“Take the goddamn baby,” Othergirl instructed, thrusting the
infant at him and peeling off her suit, slicking foam out of her hair while
glowering at her girlfriend. “I hate you.”
“Nice underwear. Nice pretending you’re not looking, Jody.”
“I’m not looking!”
he protested. “Just clean up. And clean the baby up.”
“You’re the speedster. You clean her up.”
“What does-” he began, but Visionarie cut him off.
“Clean-up rate is exponentially faster if you do it. So do
it.”
“Fine,” he grumbled, vibrating his hands a little and undressing
Maddie carefully until she was left in a white babygrow and her nappy, handing
the foamy clothes to Steph. “Can you please
make your girlfriend put clothes on?”
“I could do,” Visionarie mused with a small smile. “But I
don’t want to. Besides, she needs a bath.”
“Do I?” Othergirl asked, before noticing her girlfriend’s
expression. “Fine, I’ll take Maddie. God knows it might tire her out.”
“At least she can’t set fire to anything in the bath,”
Speedfreak reminded her helpfully. “Water… fire… not a good mix.”
“Yeah, I did do physics,” Othergirl muttered, turning and
stomping upstairs with Maddie. “Even in the Black Triangle.”
Half an hour later, she did have to admit that bathing with Maddie
was kind of fun. Once Maddie had realised that fireballs weren’t an option, and
that bubbles were a better plan, the entire scenario had played out
surprisingly well. Othergirl emerged downstairs triumphantly, wrapped in a
fluffy bathrobe, Maddie held on her hip and still resolutely wide awake.
“So: no burns, but she could get more lethal as she gets
older,” Othergirl noted, sinking onto the sofa with the baby in her arms.
“Especially if she learns about boiling points.”
“Which she won’t,” Visionarie decided, taking the child and
kissing her forehead. “Might be safest. Wouldn’t it, angel?! Now it’s bedtime,
isn’t it?!”
“No,” Maddie decided, shaking her head. “No, no, no.”
“I bet I can get her to sleep,” Speedfreak mumbled, holding
his arms out. “Pass her here.”
“No chance,” Visionarie argued, holding her a little closer.
“My go for cuddles. And besides, I can make her sleep way more easily.”
“Using the pretty pictures is cheating,” Othergirl reminded
her patiently. “Although, go nuts.”
Moments later, Maddie was asleep in Visionarie’s arms, a picture
of tranquillity as she slumbered, her thumb in her mouth.
“God, you have no idea how hot you look being all maternal,”
Othergirl whispered, leaning in to kiss Visionarie’s cheek. “Maybe we should go
upstairs…”
“That’s an idea I could get on board with,” Visionaire mused,
turning to kiss her girlfriend properly and smirking. “Jody, take the baby.”
“I- wait, what?!” he complained half-heartedly, as Maddie
was placed gently in his arms. “No fair.”
“Well, it’s this, or we… well. You get the idea.”
“Ew,” he said with distaste. “Fine. Baby. Got it. Go. Ew.”
When Levi returned in the small hours of the morning, he
found a silent house, the lounge carpet still frosted with white, and Maddie
asleep peacefully in Speedfreak’s arms, his mouth hanging open as he slumbered
too.
“Well now,” Levi murmured. “How cute, how peaceful, how… boring.”
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